Friday, June 24, 2011

Cookie Monster

         Two huge brown eyes are fixed on me right now.  Attached to these warm eyes is an incredibly cute fuzzy black face.  That's right, it's my dog, Diesel.  He is staring at me with unbreakable concentration as I pretend to ignore him and type this post.  The reason for his vigil?  I am keeping a cookie safe for my son while he pretends to build a car that will fight a tornado with eyes.  I'm not exactly sure why the cookie is involved or why JD wouldn't just eat the thing, but here I am, keeper of a decadent treat that is currently my dogs sole purpose for living. 
      Diesel sits, wags his tail, moves his little eyebrows up and down.. little attempts to get my attention while I continue to pretend I don't see him.  If I should look his way he will undoubtedly look away and pretend he couldn't care less that I have a sugar cookie with pink icing bathed in sprinkles sitting beside me on the table.  I never believe this ruse;  the moment I turn away or get up, even for a second, that cookie will be gone, hoovered in a heartbeat. 
     When this does not work according to Diesels' master plan, his second attempt is what I like to call 'Best Friends Forever'.  He will come and lay at my feet, or even ON my feet, arranging himself into his most cuddly self.  He will then put his chin on my leg and give me this look that seems to say "I would do absolutely anything in the world for you".  Then he closes his eyes, feigning sleep.  Adorable, right?  Yeah, don't trust it for a second.  The minute I let my guard down that adorable sleeping BFF is going to snatch that cookie right out from under my nose.  Diesel has now moved to this phase and is snoozing at my feet.
      The final attempt in what my dog could only think of as 'Operation Acquire Cookie' is the old 'I'm Starving' fake-out.  Diesel starts to pant and look pained, as though he hasn't eaten for days.  I swear, he appears as though he is on the brink of starvation and that cookie is the only thing that will save him.  Diesel is a master of illusions.  I love that dog.  I wouldn't doubt he has more tricks up his fur, the only reason this is the final attempt is because I usually have had enough by now.  I tell whichever boy has me guarding his cookie "if you don't eat this now I'm giving it to Diesel!"  That works.
      I have seen dogs bark, jump up on their owners, whine and beg for food or treats that the humans are enjoying.  I am very happy that my dog doesn't do those things.  He has a more creative way for begging, using his assets as best he can, which usually puts a smile on my face. 
       On a side note, the car is finished.  If anyone is interested in a vehicle that can defeat tornadoes with scary eyes (includes fire hose for putting out fires), let me know.  There are a few kinks to iron out but it may be on the market as early as 2032.