Friday, May 7, 2010

This is not me. This person sitting here at the computer, listening to her children getting into Daddy's tools and creating new uses for them, is not me.

I am carefree, independant, wealthy and happy. I am someone who never loses their temper at the kids. I have a perfectly spotless home, smelling of fresh flowers and delicious dinner that will be ready at precisely the moment my husband walks through the door. I enjoy reading, writing, and I never ever yell at my dog. I do not have an eye twitch. Under no circumstances do I feel a crushing weight in my chest when I feel I cannot take another minute, because I never ever feel like I cannot take another minute. Everything I need is in exactly the spot I need it so I can always find it. I always have a stocked pantry and freezer because I am well organized and ahead of the needs of my family. I most certainly am not the woman sitting here, with hardly any food in the house and a headache from telling the kids repeatedly to not play with the printer. I am not this girl, who feels like she is the only girl on the planet to not have it all together. I am not this person sitting here, typing this, on the verge of tears because for the 4th time this week everything is coming apart at the seams, feeling like a failure as a mother yet again. I'm not her.

I don't know who she is.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Turning from the blogs I have come here. I'll leave a greeting